Infinitely Inspirit

I've been an Inspirit for less than a year, 10 months to be exact. Not that long, eh? But there's one thing that I'm sure of - I am an Inspirit and will always be.

After all these months of being an Inspirit, I've always wondered what got me attached to these seven dorks. Di ko alam kung bakit na ever since na naging Inspirit ako, other k-groups weren't able to replace Infinite in my heart.

Maybe it's Sunggyu's eyes. Let's just pretend he has eyes, because for me has no eyes. His eyes are too small for me too see.

Maybe it's Dongwoo's laugh. That cheonsa's laugh never fails to make me laugh till my stomach hurts.

It could be Woohyun's heart machine. Even if he's my bias, it really irks me (in a good way) how greasy he can be. Sometimes I wonder how he became my bias, and how it's easy for him to make me lose my cool. (I'll end my compliments here or else this blog will have no end. XD)

The reason could be Hoya's dance moves. The way he dances just makes me want to dance as well.

Maybe it's Sungyeol's "chodingness" (if that word even exists). Despite his age, he acts like as if he's younger than me.

Or maybe it's Myungsoo's cosplayer: L. How Myungsoo can turn into L in mere seconds and turn back to Myungsoo.

It could be Sungjong's lemon candy commercial, and how prettier he is than me.

Whatever that reason is, I don't want to know. The important thing is that they've made me happier in a span of 10 months.


It's been three years since their debut but they're not yet on the peak of their success. They are still on their way there. I wish that they'll get there soon. After all the years of sacrifices they've done to make Inspirits happy, they deserve it.

On their way to their success, I hope and wish that Infinite will be able to inspire more people like how they have inspired Inspirits like me. I hope that these Inspirits will be able to feel the happiness that Infinite has given to us. The happiness of their fans is their happiness as well. I hope that, through their music, Infinite can inspire more people to aim for their dreams, and let no bars hold them down. Lastly, I hope that they will have a successful world tour. :)

Kim Sunggyu. Jang Dongwoo. Nam Woohyun. Lee Howon. Lee Sungyeol. Kim Myungsoo. Lee Sungjong.

인피니트 오빠들 사랑해요! ♥

The limit of my love for Infinite does not exist. :)))

Fourteen Days Without Him: Day 5

I'm gonna love you 'til you start looking back. I'm gonna love you so right, I wouldn't need a second chance.

Progress.

I still miss him. I still wish he would talk to me. I wish everyday that when I wake up, I would see his name onscreen. And every morning my hopes are dashed.

I'm still asking the same questions. How can he stand this? Am I really waiting for something? Will he come back? Does he still love me? Does he miss me?

Everyday is the same. This sick cycle goes on and on and on and the only one stuck in the center is me. It feels like this huge vortex is pulling me in and I can't get away. For a moment or two, I would feel like I am in control but the tides turn and I am in the wrong end again, each time worse than the last.

A lot of people have told me to just let go. But, I can't. I can't because I'm willing to see this through the end. Even if a part of me wants to protect myself and cut my losses this early on, I know that I would still be pushing forward. Because what he doesn't know is that I am willing to fight for him.

I miss you. I love you. It's easier to believe in words. It's easier to hold on to them. In this case, I don't even have a choice. The words you said were the only things I have. Those are the only things that could make or break me. When I think about the 9 more days that I have wait, I feel like just giving up. And it's tempting, so tempting, to start the process of letting go and moving on and starting over. I know that when I do that and you don't come back, I would not feel so sorry for myself. But, if I do that and you come back, I would feel even worse.

Remember when I said that you were worth all the risks? It hasn't changed. I am hurting. I can feel my heart breaking into smaller pieces for every moment that passes by without you. But I don't want to let go just yet. I won't.

I love you. I love you. I love you.

Come back soon and tell me you love me still.

PS.

I've downloaded Once Upon A Time like you asked me to do. I've watched everything. When we see each other again, let's watch it together, okay? I miss you, love. :)

Fourteen Days Without Him: Day 4

If you just walked away, what could I really say? Would it matter anyway? Would it change how you feel?

As a consequence of drinking too much coffee, my gastritis acted up. I was not able to go to school and spent hours lying on my bed willing the pain to go away. This sucks big time.

I had the inclination to buy some milk because that is what usually makes me feel better during my bouts of sickness. But, my cravings pushed me to go to a coffee shop and get myself a white hot chocolate. :"> So, mustering all the strength I have left I made the ten-minute ride to the cafe and appeased my tired self with my favorite drink.

But, the serene ambiance of the almost empty place reduced me to a teary mess in a matter of minutes. The feelings that I have been trying to suppress all this time came tumbling out of me in a series of sniffs and sobs. I felt so pathetic crying discreetly in an empty second floor of a coffee shop.

A friend tried to console me through text messaging and she told me that I should just tell him that I miss him. Initially, I was averse to the idea as that would actually defy his intention of staying away for the moment. But, feelings overcame common sense so I texted him and I told him that I missed him.

Hi. :) I know you wanted your space but I just wanted to tell you I miss you. Haha. I hope you're doing fine. I love you. :)

You know what he said? 

Nothing.

What am I supposed to think then? Is he ever coming back?

No matter, I will be waiting.

And when you're needing your space to do some navigating, I'll be here patiently waiting to see what you find.